I haven't made a post in well over two weeks. I don't know why. I can think of a couple explanations I guess.
Maybe my English classes have sucked all my creativity out.
Maybe they've shown me the immaturity of my works.
Maybe I've run out of things to say.
But I haven't run out of things to say. I have lists of things that I want to say. For some reason I just feel like I can't get it out. I have these grand visions with these epic conclusions but I'm not getting them done. I guess I'm holding a bar too high, tossing aside everything aside from perfection.
Is it right for me to put so much weight on my writing? Is it fair?
Maybe instead of wondering why I "can't" write, I should focus on why I won't. And why is that?
There's something of despair in me. Something of futility. I can't pinpoint it, but it's slowly extinguishing my fire. That fire I used to have when I spoke of Dominism, when I had a goal.
Or a mission. Or both. Maybe I should give that kind of idea another try. Starting from scratch, and being careful not to get ahead of myself this time.
But I'm tired. I'm weary. Much like the feeling I got after attempting to write a novel twice, I feel as if I no longer have it within me to create an ideology.
And I apologize that I'm writing yet another "I don't know what to do" post. But I don't know what else to do.
I don't know.
Monday, February 11, 2008
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Oh fudgeknuckles. You write with much more frequency than any other person I know and yet you still churn out this sillyness. You feel drained of creativity? Big deal. Let it come. There's a good reason the arts are held in such a different perspective from the sciences; you can't just churn something out whenever you think it necessary.
ReplyDeleteIf you feel you really must write something, just pick a random thing and make it meaningful. Make it shine with that Dommy flare. Who cares if it isn't perfect (I don't care that you care)? Perfection is the one thing that I'll admit is impossible.
Write about butterflies.